Like many I’m not perfect , and I know in my past I have hurt people by my actions and or words! I try to take accountability for those times I said things that were unnecessary and later felt so bad about letting my emotions get the best of me ! Even those with pure intentions can make mistakes and not consider how our words or actions can affect other people! So recognize your actions and mistakes ! And follow my steps !
1. Recognize the Harm
Be clear in your own mind about what you did and how it affected them. Avoid justifying your actions in your head — this step is about understanding their perspective.
2. Approach Them With Respect
Choose a private, appropriate time to talk. Show you’re ready to listen, not just explain.
3. Use Direct and Specific Words
Instead of vague statements like “I’m sorry if you were hurt” (which shifts blame), try:
“I realize that when I [specific action], it hurt you. That was wrong, and I take full responsibility.”
4. Own Your Impact, Not Just Your Intent
Your intention might not have been to hurt them, but the impact still matters. Avoid “but” statements that minimize responsibility (“I’m sorry, but I was just upset”).
5. Listen Without Defending
Let them express how they felt — without interrupting. Accept that their feelings are valid even if you see the situation differently.
6. Make Amends
Ask: “What can I do to make this right?” Be prepared to take action — whether it’s repairing something tangible, changing a behavior, or giving them space.
7. Commit to Change
Share the steps you’ll take to prevent repeating the harm. Follow through consistently — accountability is proven over time.
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